Since 2017, I have chosen a word I want to focus on for the year. I have chosen the words listen, enjoy, intentional in the past. I ended up skipping 2020 (which in hindsight was probably a good idea) but now I am back for 2021!
My One Little Word for 2021 — Confident
I want to become more confident this next year. In a book I am currently reading, someone is described with a “ready smile and a confidence that prompted quick conversation with just about anybody…a youthful zest for living.” I wrote that sentence down because I want that to be me. I am sick of feeling insecure and letting that get in the way of creating connections with others, whether they are strangers at the store or my closest relatives and friends.
I’ve always thought of confidence as something you were born with or something you earned or organically achieved after a certain event or after a certain amount of time. And although I think most everyone becomes naturally less insecure and more confident as they get older (something I was looking forward to when I get into my 30’s), why not do the work to become more confident now?
The truth is, I am completely in charge of how I feel, including whether or not I feel confident. I need to practice feeling confident and build that confidence gradually — one piece at a time.
There were three definitions of confidence and I love each one for different reasons:
- The feeling or belief that one can rely on someone or something; firm trust
- The state of feeling certain about the truth of something
- A feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities
I want to be the type of person that others can rely on and have a firm trust in. I want to recognize and appreciate my own qualities where I am, not until I get to a certain point and then I can feel confident. I want to let myself get out of my comfort zone and be silly just to be silly. To not care what others think and be more present in conversations.
My purpose to become more confident is driven in wanting to build deeper relationships with my friends and family. I feel that I hold back and second-guess myself in almost everything I do. Which doesn’t leave much room for vulnerability, openness, and showing a sincere interest in others — since I am constantly thinking about myself and what they think of me. Once I let go of those negative thoughts, I can let down that wall and stand a little straighter.
A few strategies I plan on implementing to becoming more confident is to adjust my body language, practice positive thinking, focus on accepting myself unconditionally, build rapport with others by showing respect and deep listening, and making value-driven choices.
“Confidence is like any other emotion. It is something you feel, and you can train yourself to access it in an instant.”
Tony Robbins
Here is a breakdown of the ways I want to be more confident in multiple facets of my life.
Spiritually Confident
I want to be confident in my testimony of Christ, in my ability to read and relate scripture to my own (and other’s) lives, and get out of my comfort zone so I can have a more service-oriented life. I want the Lord to have confidence in me to listen and act on His promptings so that I may be an instrument in His hand.
“Spiritual confidence increases when you know that the Lord knows that you bear no ill feelings toward another soul.”
Elder Jörg Klebingat — Approaching the Throne of God with Confidence
Confidence in my Parenting Abilities
In 2021, I will take ownership of the way I want to parent my children. We each have our own ways of doing things and instead of worrying what others think of my parenting skills I will do what I think is best for my family and be confident in that decision. If I am happy with what I am doing, then nothing else matters.
Confident in my Body
Just like many women, it is very easy for me to find the flaws I see in myself, both inside and outside. I have always had it in my head that I will be more confident in myself when I get to a certain weight, or when I get procedures like Lasik surgery done. But I want to feel confident now, not until I meet those certain goals. I think the first step to shifting my pattern of thought is to focus on feeling healthier and not worrying about a certain number on the scale.
I recently started the goal of drinking 72 ounces of water a day and cutting out soda and I have already felt the benefits of that. Getting dressed for the day, washing my face at night, moisturizing, exercising more, stretching, and taking the time to establish a morning routine are the goals I have for myself in terms of my physical body.
“Confidence is the most beautiful thing you can possess.”
Sabrina Carpenter
Confident as an Artist
Now I think anyone who identifies as an artist will tell you that always feeling confident in your abilities can sometimes seem unreachable and there is always that pesky imposter syndrome lurking nearby. This year, I want to allow myself the freedom to make what I want, post what I want, and write what I want in all the faucets I have as an artist. I plan to write more on this blog, showing bits of my life and lots of creative projects I am working on. I will not stress about what other people think when or what I post on Instagram. I can’t wait to jump back into the creative side of my life now that I’ve somewhat settled in as a mother of two and will have more space to work on those projects.
I obviously have a lot to say about this word and my goals with it. So let’s hope that 2021 will be the year where I become more confident.